The Music that Moves Me

“Hey, uh, listen
I just got finished listening to the album
And, uhm, I cried a little, I laughed a little
But, uhm, Judah, I love it
And I think it’s real and raw
And I think you did the right thing
And I think it’s not only, uhm
May bring, you know, help and hope to a lot of others
I think it gave me a lot of hope
And, um, anyway, I loved it”

As someone with diagnosed social anxiety disorder, which has, at times, been close to minor agoraphobia, I can sometimes find myself feeling overwhelmed as I walk across the campus quad at school. Combined with my ADHD, where my mind is running faster than I can consciously process, it can be difficult for me to center myself. I’ve worked hard to overcome the inability to leave the house, but it wasn’t easy and it took a lot of practice and copious amount of medication at distinct times. I often find myself looking at other people wondering if they’re looking back at me. I wonder, like many people with SAD, what they’re thinking of me.

“I guess you’re just broken
I guess you’re just hoping for more
I guess you’re just reaching
I guess you’re just in need of love
But you’re not alone
You’re not alone
In this”

Family helps, as do friends. Having a plan to focus on is also essential for me. When I can combine the two, having a plan to focus on that involves family or friends, it’s ideal. It took a long time for me to find people with whom I gel. I have a personality that some people find irritating (don’t worry, I find me annoying, too). Finding people who can see past that, who can see the good qualities that I have, is special to me.

“I guess I’m just broken
I guess I’m just hoping for more
I guess I’m just reaching
I guess I’m just in need of love
But I’m not alone
I’m not alone
In this
I’m not alone
I’m not alone
In this”

As a highly creative person, my imagination never stops working, but although it can be challenging to focus on one thing at a time, I often find my mind making connections between my friends and certain smells, tastes, objects, and more often than not, music. Some songs mean the world to me because they remind me that I’m not alone in my struggle on this planet. I have loyal friends, a loving family, and a fantastic support system. Sometimes I’m not okay. But I know that not being okay is okay because one day I will be.

“Woo
I just wanted to call and tell you I’m proud of you
And I’m, uhm, you know, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry
To put you through all that
I do, I hate it, I hate it
But I, I think it’s real, and I think it’s raw
And I think it’s, you know
I think it’s precious, and I love it
And, uhm, I’m, I’m so proud of you
I’m glad you’re my son
So I’m glad you’re real, and, thank you
I just, I don’t know, I love you
And I thank you, thank you

The best is yet to come
The best is yet to come
The best is yet to come
The best is yet to come…”

The song I’ve quoted in this article is called “Family/The Best is Yet to Come.” It was written and is performed by Judah and the Lion from their fourth, full in-studio album, “Pep Talks,” which was released in 2019. The song is slower and sweet, building in intensity towards the end. It’s a beautiful song that I would say is probably my favourite of 2019. It reminds me that even during the darkest days, there are people out there who care about me and love me. Maybe they don’t say it every day, but they don’t have to. For them, I am forever grateful. Like the music that moves me, they keep me going when I don’t think I’m strong enough to take another step.

(To learn more about Judah and the Lion, or to get information about tour dates, “Pep Talks”, or their other albums, please visit their website and give them your support)

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